Covid & a Cone: How My Foster Dog Taught Me to Heal

I recently contracted COVID-19 for the second time. Since it wasn't as debilitating as the first time I was afflicted, I convinced myself to push through it. I thought I could still keep the house clean, run my business, do yard work, and be a responsive friend /sister /daughter /granddaughter. I was doing pretty well, living almost a normal life despite the lethargy, body aches, and congestion (it's just like bad allergies - it's fine!). Then my foster dog came home from surgery.

Chief enjoying some front porch sun on May 15, 2024

Chief is a Velcro dog. My snobby chihuahua mix doesn't understand this term, but it's when a dog loves you so much, they can't have you out of their sight. When I would get up to unload the dishwasher, Chief and his cumbersome cone would follow me. When I swept, weeded, or did anything that required being off the couch, he was there beside me. No matter how often I urged him to lie down and rest, he maintained his post by my side.

By early afternoon, I stopped folding laundry long enough to peer into Chief's eyes. I could tell he was tired. I probably could have seen the same thing in my reflection if I hadn't been avoiding it all day (I look like death regurgitated when I'm sick). As I stood to restock the linen closet, with Chief poised to follow me, I heard the vet's voice ringing in my ears - "he may need to rest a lot while he's healing."

So I sat down. I watched TV, pulled out an adult coloring book, and did my best not to move the rest of the day. I rested for hours, not for the sake of my virus-plagued body, but for this tired lab mix who had been through a lot since he came to live with us three weeks ago. The respite gave me time to think.

Why have we become so uncomfortable in a sedentary state? How is this resistance to rest affecting the rest of our lives? I recently read that autoimmune disorders are rising at an alarming rate, particularly in women. While medical professionals haven't identified a singular cause, there's growing evidence that stress and worry can exacerbate or even induce autoimmune disorders. The bodies of our ancestors rightly entered fight-or-flight mode when confronted with a threat to their lives; but when the threat receded, so did the heightened stress state.

The difference today is that our threats don't retreat. They're ever-present - climate change, concerns for our children, violence and war, even if many of us are privileged to only see it on TV instead of in our backyards. There's also work stress, juggling family schedules, and the constant need to check the latest message, email, or Instagram reel pinging from the computer in our pockets.

I don't have a single solution to all of this chaos. I don't know how to slow our lives down, reduce the noise and our growing to-do lists. I do know that saying "yes" to one more act in service of another can feel like fueling a fast-moving fire, and the tipping point to burnout. When we feel overwhelmed, helping others is often the first thing sacrificed from our to-do list.

Sometimes acting in service of others is precisely what we need to stop burnout in its tracks though. The cure may be found in the moment that gives you perspective on your life (a remedy for cynicism - the first element of burnout). It's the friendship you make while volunteering (a remedy for inefficacy - the second dimension of burnout). It's the anxious foster dog who forces you to lie still on the couch when you’re sick (a remedy for burnout’s third element - exhaustion).

It's important to understand that burnout is more than being overcommitted or overworked, though those can certainly contribute to it. A lack of purpose, connection, and meaning are also significant contributors. If you're feeling burned out, it's crucial to identify which element is present in your life to find the right solution for you.

My solution just happened to be a recently-neutered foster dog.